Wearing rose coloured glasses....

I sometimes wonder if I go through life wearing rose coloured glasses.  The last few days I have been beating myself up.  Feeling like an asshole for something I thought I had done wrong on Sunday.  Last night I was beating myself up AGAIN.  I actually went as far as calling myself and asshole.  Then I realized, wait, I was being myself.  Yes, I was being aggressive, saying and doing what my feelings were telling me to.  I thought I had offended the other person with my actions. I felt really bad about this.  The thing that was making me feel bad was the silence.  

I hate silence, HATE IT!  If you have an issue with me, you need to tell me what it is.  I would rather you tell me and make me understand what I did so I don't do it again.  Rather, than completely ignore me.  I have a crazy imagination and start to over analyze the situation.  I start to replay the conversations over and over again.  Wishing I hadn't said this and that.  I will do this for days!  I then start to beat myself up.  If you just tell me up front what the issue is, we can either fix it and move on or fix it and I move on.  

I need to know the answers to EVERYTHING and sometimes won't leave people alone until I get those answers.  I never want to become an annoyance but I really need to clear things up.  I was going to completely back off the situation but have decided that if by Saturday I don't hear from this person.  I will give that person a call.  If we can go no further, I want to at least end things off on good terms.  I don't want to be the asshole.  Because truly I'm not.