Every once in a while, after a shitty week, I will say I want a 'do over'. After the week I had... I want a 'never happen again' week. A combination of a health scare and a person showing their true colours to me, had me feeling incredibly low. When I start feeling sad and depressed, I tend to over think everything, this time around though, it put me in the headset that had me thinking hard about my future. We are only allowed a short period of time on this large rock and I'm not using my time wisely! Circumstances or people are usually around to remind me of this.
I stood back and took inventory of all the things I was doing to waste time. When I sat down and figured it out, I felt ill that I had been wasting hours of my time on Facebook. Hours that should be spent researching and writing, or having a life. I think everyone should do the same, take a look at how much time you are wasting on this 'social media'. It's not social at all, in fact it is turning us into a bunch of addicted hermits.
Every once in a while I am reminded by my peers that I'm good at what I do. In the midst of my hell week, I was once again reminded that I need get my arse moving and dedicate myself to my passion and love, I need to put my blinders on and finish my manuscripts. Having a potentially serious health issue come up made me realize I haven't been working hard enough and am slowly letting my dream slip away. Distractions such as people, who don't deserve to be in my life and facebook are the biggest of the two. So... I quit both cold turkey.
Wait, let me back up a bit. I didn't quit everyone, just someone who showed me who they really were. I spend way too much of my time trying to please others and never having them reciprocate, this can no longer happen. There was a point in my life where I wouldn't stand for anyone's bullshit. At some point in the last several years, I felt like I needed to be 'nicer', that I needed people to 'accept me'. I hate that person. I hate that I let others come first. I hate that I lost that girl who didn't give a shit if she pushed ahead in the line. I can't be that person any longer especially if I want to achieve these goals that I've set out for myself. I use to have balls and after some digging, I've found them again.
Though hard, quitting certain people and facebook is exactly what I needed to do to get back on track. Though the benefits of facebook (networking and knowing what events are going on) will be missed, I need to step away from it and having negative people in my life... only drags me down.
I never want to repeat last week ever again and if I stick to the new plan, I never will!
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